Helping my family through these difficult times

TRIGGER WARNING: medical gore? And talks of flat lining in medical facility.

Alright guys.. So this is gonna be a kinda long winded, health discussion and update on things going on in my life.. I want to give a MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING!!! there will be pictures of a hernia and talk about how it came about to be, as well as flat lining during a medical e.ergency.

OK, so let's start back in March of 2022.. I was pregnant with a little boy and we couldn't have been more excited. I started having severe struggles with my breathing and after like 3 Weeks.. I went to the emergency room. Those of you who know me: know that my health has always been shit. Born with an annular pancreas and was diagnosed with chronic pancreatitis with chronic bouts of acute pancreatitis. Fun stuff lemme tell ya.. WELL, the ER dr said he believed it to be all cardiac due to my cardiomegaly. OK, so the ultrasound on my heart showed I wasn't in active cardiac failure.. So I was sent home. Fast forward to March 18, 2022. We went to an appointment at the high risk specialist in Wilmington, NC to see the baby etc. They not only called an ambulance to take me immediately to women and children's at NHRMC, but they brought the gurney to me as they felt I was under of pulmonary distress.

We get to the hospital and a CTPE is done which comes back positive for a pulmonary embolism in the lower lobe of my left lung.. Now all the racing heart stuff and shortness of breath etc made sense. Around 8 hours later whilst I'm hooked up to 6 liters of oxygen, I coded. Last thing I remember before everything going black was hearing the alarms and a bunch of people rushing in my room.

I guess I flat lined.. Next thing I remember, is these incredibly kind brown eyes, and a voice saying "don't worry honey, I'm gonna take good care of you and your baby boy." Everything goes black again. (Come to find out, it was the anesthesiologist after they'd brought me back).

I wake up late evening of March 19, 2022 and long story short, I'm in the ICU. They'd only kept me in the medically induced coma until they felt I was stable enough to be weaned off of those medications they use. Now mind you, this is a time where we were (in NC) still under a state of emergency, due to Covid-19 and all medical professionals were protected under some sort of "immunity" for lack of better words.

So, along comes in my nurse to check on my massive c-section wound with her brown pony tail bouncing all around cuz she was in such a rush. This is when she opened my abdomen bandage to check on the incision, but like I said she was in a rush.. Rather than carefully opening said abdomen wrap, it was done very quickly and carelessly. Now when I tell you that I've NEVER experienced a pain like this.. I KNEW, something was wrong and screamed out in literal agony!

This nurse (I'll never forget her face...), had caused the inside incision stitches to burst from being so careless. From that point forward, there'd randomly be a bulge that would ripple across a portion of my belly and caused insane amounts of pain. I asked the attending physician overseeing my care if she could plz order a CT scan of my belly to show for sure what had happened in the ICU. She refused.. Not only did she refuse, BUT (and I have all of this in patient portal online) every time I asked she'd mention what I had requested and would mockingly mention this "bulge." I continued to request a scan of my belly be done to no avail, up until the day we were discharged almost a week and a half later.

From this point on, I was seeing my general practitioner very regularly and not only did we find out that my incision had busted.. But a had a large hernia from the trauma.

Fast forward again.. Current day.. This hernia not only is massive, but my small intestines and a portion of my colon are in it, due to my abdominal wall not being in tact. The pain, the obvious additional health struggles caused directly by this and/or affected have been absolutely devastating.

Due to the pulmonary embolism I have to remain on a blood thinner.. The cardiomegaly has also caused cardiomyopathy, and we found out in january (Dr believes it to be due to stress and living a more sedentary life due to everything with this hernia) I also have liver disease. I've seen two general surgeons, and an abdominal wall repair specialist in wilmington, NC.. all of which have said that no surgeon would touch me due to the insanely high risk nature of.. Me.

So here we are. Two and a half years later, and things have only become more and more difficult. If it wasn't for the immediate support of my fiance, kiddos, and all of our family.. Idk where I'd be. I've become a social recluse.. Not being able to be as mobile (and youll see why, as if everything I've told you so far wasn't enough).. I've gained weight, which has taken a massive toll on my mental health, hence making me too insecure to even make much content here and there.

I need help y'all. Things have become more and more difficult, and life is so.. Expensive. As things became worse, my fiance has had to stay home with the boys and I due to their needs and my struggles. Thank GOD for my amazingly loving and supportive in-laws whom we reside with.

Now, what I'm about to show y'all.. Is awful, disgusting, and my hernia is so massive that it has pushed my belly button much closer to my left hip rather than where it once was.. Y'all, if you can.. Whether its a share, like, comment, or if you're able to donate.. I'd be forever in your debt. Any help will go towards cost of living, other needs, and would be so appreciated!

So umm.. As embarrassing as it is to show this.. Here are pictures of what this hernia has become. Who knows.. Maybe this post will reach a surgeon who would actually be willing to perform any necessary surgeries to get ya girl in a little better shape health wise..

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